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Family member depression -
January 13th, 2012, 01:03 AM
I believe my son is struggling with significant depression. There is no end to proposed causes/cures, so Job's 'comforters' be warned/scorned (we don't need sozo's personal rants against 'mental illness').
Any wisdom from other's experiences in relation to medication, alternative medicine, spiritual/sin issues, demonic/deliverance, work, etc.?
How does one cope as a loved one (I already have a heavy weight with my work, wife's illness, finances, etc.)? How does the victim retain hope until a lifting occurs?
Theological issues as to why we suffer and God does not zap the problem away all the time (healing, deliverance, passive approach with God vs active/prayerful one, etc.)?
In 1978, I had a 'nervous breakdown' that led me to Christ. My father also had mental health issues for years.
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They said: "Where is the God of Elijah?"
I say: "Where are the Elijahs of God?" (Ravenhill "Why Revival Tarries")
I believe my son is struggling with significant depression...Any wisdom from other's experiences in relation to medication, alternative medicine, spiritual/sin issues, demonic/deliverance, work, etc.?
What are the symptoms? What seems to be the cause?
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do unto others as you would have them do unto you
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January 13th, 2012, 02:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by godrulz
I believe my son is struggling with significant depression. There is no end to proposed causes/cures, so Job's 'comforters' be warned/scorned (we don't need sozo's personal rants against 'mental illness').
Any wisdom from other's experiences in relation to medication, alternative medicine, spiritual/sin issues, demonic/deliverance, work, etc.?
How does one cope as a loved one (I already have a heavy weight with my work, wife's illness, finances, etc.)? How does the victim retain hope until a lifting occurs?
Theological issues as to why we suffer and God does not zap the problem away all the time (healing, deliverance, passive approach with God vs active/prayerful one, etc.)?
In 1978, I had a 'nervous breakdown' that led me to Christ. My father also had mental health issues for years.
I'm sorry! I wish I had good advice but truly am seeking myself for similar family issues. I will pray for you though.
walk by faith and not by sight is all I can really offer otherwise.
wish I had more to offer. God bless
I believe my son is struggling with significant depression. There is no end to proposed causes/cures, so Job's 'comforters' be warned/scorned (we don't need sozo's personal rants against 'mental illness').
Any wisdom from other's experiences in relation to medication, alternative medicine, spiritual/sin issues, demonic/deliverance, work, etc.?
How does one cope as a loved one (I already have a heavy weight with my work, wife's illness, finances, etc.)? How does the victim retain hope until a lifting occurs?
Theological issues as to why we suffer and God does not zap the problem away all the time (healing, deliverance, passive approach with God vs active/prayerful one, etc.)?
In 1978, I had a 'nervous breakdown' that led me to Christ. My father also had mental health issues for years.
I'm so sorry for the suffering of yourself and your family members.
If we suffer physical illnesses, it's best to see a relevant health professional.
If you or your son had diabetes, you would want a diabetes expert involved. If you or your son had epilepsy, you would want an epilepsy specialist involved (I hope, since that's how I dealt with one of my sons)
If you or your son had a mental health problem I would hope you would want a mental health expert involved (I've benefitted hugely from psychologists a few times for temporary 'mental health' conditions eg stress from being held hostage by a dangerous client ... if the client had damaged my physical welfare eg break bones, you would have rightly expected a physical health expert to intervene, but instead the client harmed my mental welfare, so a mental health expert intervened.)
Welfare does take time to fix ... damaged bones can take weeks to heal and so can damaged outlooks. Sometimes meds may be required and sometimes they won't ... depends whether the brain has produced any chemicals which may need to be modified ... like some diabetics need insulin and some don't.
Please ensure an excellent psychologist is involved, because depression is truly a health issue and you hopefully wouldn't use guess-work with diabetes or broken bones, and hopefully won't with mental health issues either.
May God bless and lead you and yours and bring relief and comfort
I believe my son is struggling with significant depression. There is no end to proposed causes/cures, so Job's 'comforters' be warned/scorned (we don't need sozo's personal rants against 'mental illness').
Any wisdom from other's experiences in relation to medication, alternative medicine, spiritual/sin issues, demonic/deliverance, work, etc.?
How does one cope as a loved one (I already have a heavy weight with my work, wife's illness, finances, etc.)? How does the victim retain hope until a lifting occurs?
Theological issues as to why we suffer and God does not zap the problem away all the time (healing, deliverance, passive approach with God vs active/prayerful one, etc.)?
In 1978, I had a 'nervous breakdown' that led me to Christ. My father also had mental health issues for years.
My heart goes out to you and your family, GR.
I cannot offer any advice on specific medication as I'm sure the meds used here would be different to those in the US. However, I would certainly take him to see a Dr (that he trusts) and see which is the best way to handle it from a medical point of view.
The thing with meds though, is that they aren't made to cure depression or take it away entirely. They simply help lessen the number of bad days you have. Sometimes people will be doing ok then have a slump even though they are on meds...I did. You have to persist through it though, keep taking them every day. Also, some meds have quite bad side effects, so it can sometimes take time to find the right one.
For the record, I take Lexapro and have found it excellent.
I would also find a counsellor or psychologist to help him work through the reasons he is depressed. This is a really important part IMO... having someone impartial to listen and help you find your way through it all.
It will all take time. There is no quick fix but the sooner he starts, the sooner he will start to feel improvements within himself.
The frustrating thing for family and friends is that there really isn't much you can do, besides be supportive and listen when he needs to talk.
The most important part is being proactive about it... which he won't always feel like doing.... if you sit and allow yourself to wallow, it only gets harder to dig your way out.
Lastly, ask God to help. I believe that God works healing through others, in situations like this. If you ask God to be in control, the right people will show up at the right time; the right things will be said exactly when they are needed.
It's not a nice place to be but God promises to be with us and because of that, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.
I remember my mother saying that she knows how it feels
and
you can't even decide whether or not to go to the bathroom
and
then there is this
"Never despair; but if you do, work on in despair." Edmund Burke
please no medicine
and
just let them be
time and circumstances will cure most everything
time and circumstances and lack of meds may not cure cancer, or diabetes, or glaucoma, or rabies ( a vaccination can save a nasty death) etc. Many health problems require intervention ... some address the outside of the body and some address specific internal organs eg heart or pancreas .... or even brain ie mental health.
When stressed, the body can produce chemicals which can be temporarily beneficial, yet be toxic if produced long term eg fight-or-flight chemicals are great to help people run from danger, yet poison the body if stressed long-term. Antidotes are needed against poisons ... and some meds are antidotes to body poisons. Some meds give us beneficial chemicals which the body may have stopped producing eg insulin. Experts should be involved to inform sick people about their options, whether meds are involved or not.
time and circumstances and lack of meds may not cure cancer, or diabetes, or glaucoma, or rabies ( a vaccination can save a nasty death) etc. Many health problems require intervention ... some address the outside of the body and some address specific internal organs eg heart or pancreas .... or even brain ie mental health.
When stressed, the body can produce chemicals which can be temporarily beneficial, yet be toxic if produced long term eg fight-or-flight chemicals are great to help people run from danger, yet poison the body if stressed long-term. Antidotes are needed against poisons ... and some meds are antidotes to body poisons. Some meds give us beneficial chemicals which the body may have stopped producing eg insulin. Experts should be involved to inform sick people about their options, whether meds are involved or not.
if there is something wrong, just take a pill
and
when that no longer works, find another pill
or
another doctor who will find a stronger one
just take a look at our old people and all the drugs they are on
if there is something wrong, just take a pill
and
when that no longer works, find another pill
or
another doctor who will find a stronger one
just take a look at our old people and all the drugs they are on
I'm not promoting taking pills or promoting not taking pills
I'm promoting gaining expert intervention who will look at the individual case and professionally discuss options which may include pills or no pills
Making blanket statements promoting drugs or promoting no drugs is not beneficial
Some old people takes heaps of pills and some old people don't
You might tell a diabetic not to take insulin, but I won't tell them not to. I'd advise them to follow a beneficial specialist's advice.
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January 13th, 2012, 05:13 AM
I'm one of the few members of my family that hasn't suffered from depression, but a lot of my relatives found that medication only really delayed resolving the problem. Finding a really good counsellor who actually knows a lot about psychological and developmental theory - as opposed to the "Mm. That must have been hard for you. Aww. Have you tried counting to ten and looking on the bright side?" kind - seems to be a good way of paving the road for your own long-term improvement, although obviously it can be hard finding an adequate one and then engaging properly with what they offer.
I'm not promoting taking pills or promoting not taking pills
I'm promoting gaining expert intervention who will look at the individual case and professionally discuss options which may include pills or no pills
Making blanket statements promoting drugs or promoting no drugs is not beneficial
Some old people takes heaps of pills and some old people don't
You might tell a diabetic not to take insulin, but I won't tell them not to. I'd advise them to follow a beneficial specialist's advice.
how many times have you gone to the doctor
and
not given a prescription drug?
As one who has been through a bout of significant/severe depression (mine lasted about two years with a few breaks in between), I have a few things that I would advise.
First, if medication can be avoided, then avoid it. It does help in the short-term, but there are a number of unintended consequences of taking them. When on them (cymbalta), I certainly didn't feel as bad, but I was also unable to feel good either. Also, it was hell coming off them. I remember the brain shivers (it felt like I was constantly falling). Additionally, the anxiety felt worse when I came off the anti-depressants for a while.
Second, physical activity is essential. He needs to get up and do several small (and physical) tasks each day. Setting up small but attainable goals will help him feel like he's accomplished something.
Third, he needs to find a Christian friend that he can trust. He needs to talk to someone about what's bothering him. It's important for him to pinpoint what's making him feel this way. With me, my depression grew out of causing the emotional pain of my wife. It wasn't until I dealt with that and our relationship that I was able to gain some form of healing. He needs wisdom from godly people like the following:
Quote:
The most important part is being proactive about it... which he won't always feel like doing.... if you sit and allow yourself to wallow, it only gets harder to dig your way out.
Lastly, ask God to help. I believe that God works healing through others, in situations like this. If you ask God to be in control, the right people will show up at the right time; the right things will be said exactly when they are needed.
It's not a nice place to be but God promises to be with us and because of that, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.
All of this might help, and I hope that it does. You just focus on being there for him because he'll need you.
Eucharist [thanksgiving] is the state of the perfect man. Eucharist is the life of paradise. Eucharist is the only full and real response of man to God's creation, redemption, and gift of heaven. - Alexander Schemann
It's been around for many years. Here is one of the reviews at Amazon, I've bolded the last bit because I do think that's important as well. God bless your family.
NB: I have not read it myself, so I can't offer a personal recommendation.
5.0 out of 5 stars If you suffer from depression or anxiety, read this., December 24, 1999 This book is for those who desire self-help using a cognitive method. Dr. Low was an unrecognized pioneer in the mental health field; he has been credited by his patients with saving many lives. The book is extremely practical. It may encourage readers to participate in a self-help organization founded in 1937 which has in the intervening years become international in scope. One may choose portions of the book that are applicable. After having read the book more than 25 years ago and consulting it as a resource, I recommend it for those suffering from mental/emotional afflictions for whom self-help is appropriate. Recovery does not replace a professional, but rather works with him/her.
how many times have you gone to the doctor
and
not given a prescription drug?
honestly .... most of the time.
eg Last time I went to the doctor (over a year ago) he removed a localised cancer from my elbow and the tests showed it was all totally removed so no meds of any description were prescribed.
I suffer seasonal allergies (similar to hay fever problems) which results in inflammation of mucous membranes and causes me ear abscesses at change of seasons, but because the doctor found the problem was weather related (from air-born pollens or spores) rather than infection, I'm not prescribed medication since there are no germs needing killing etc. I may take some over-the-counter anti-histamines and panadol at the time (for about 4 days at change of seasons) and that's it ... I consider myself very lucky to not have any illness or serious condition which requires medication, but some people do suffer illnesses and conditions requiring medication and it would be evil to with-hold medication from them. My son's fits were awful until he was correctly diagnosed and medicated by a specialist. If anyone would promote that he shouldn't have had meds, I would consider such cruelty as evil. His meds enabled him to lead a more comfortable and reasonable life. His friend who has diabetes also leads a more comfortable and reasonable life with meds/insulin. His other friend who lost limbs in an accident also leads a more comfortable and reasonable life with meds. My grand-daughter requires meds to enable her to breathe in winter. No meds=death!
If you manage life without pills, thank God for that rare blessing, but not everyone is so lucky to manage without them.
It's been around for many years. Here is one of the reviews at Amazon, I've bolded the last bit because I do think that's important as well. God bless your family.
5.0 out of 5 stars If you suffer from depression or anxiety, read this., December 24, 1999 This book is for those who desire self-help using a cognitive method. Dr. Low was an unrecognized pioneer in the mental health field; he has been credited by his patients with saving many lives. The book is extremely practical. It may encourage readers to participate in a self-help organization founded in 1937 which has in the intervening years become international in scope. One may choose portions of the book that are applicable. After having read the book more than 25 years ago and consulting it as a resource, I recommend it for those suffering from mental/emotional afflictions for whom self-help is appropriate. Recovery does not replace a professional, but rather works with him/her.
Total agreement ... self-help is promoted by good psychologists and the psychologists I saw aided me with their professional abilities and they promoted reading specific books which would enable self-help also.