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Reload this Page A little humour - Know any good jokes?
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Town Heretic Town Heretic is online now
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May 6th, 2012, 05:45 PM
1st Man: Knock-knock.

2nd Man: Who's there?

1st Man: Interrupting Cow.

2nd Man: Interrupting cow wh--

1st Man: MOOO!!!
   
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Arthur Brain Arthur Brain is offline
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May 6th, 2012, 05:59 PM
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Originally Posted by Town Heretic View Post
1st Man: Knock-knock.

2nd Man: Who's there?

1st Man: Interrupting Cow.

2nd Man: Interrupting cow wh--

1st Man: MOOO!!!
Well that was udderly awful....





Well this is fun isn't it?
   
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annabenedetti annabenedetti is offline
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May 6th, 2012, 08:16 PM
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Originally Posted by Arthur Brain View Post
I don't think it went the way anyone hoped....

Still, hopefully 'alpaca' punch with this offering.....



hello?

Tough crowd tonight....
   
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May 7th, 2012, 05:11 PM
Here's one for you kids to try on your parents:

Why can't the T-Rex clap its hands?

Because it's extinct, you moron.

They might not get the punch-line at first, so keep hammering it home.
   
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annabenedetti annabenedetti is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 05:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Town Heretic View Post
Here's one for you kids to try on your parents:
Why can't the T-Rex clap its hands?

Because it's extinct, you moron.
They might not get the punch-line at first, so keep hammering it home.

I'm assuming you tried this yourself once?



   
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Arthur Brain Arthur Brain is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 05:16 PM
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Originally Posted by annabenedetti View Post
I'm assuming you tried this yourself once?
Lets just hope he received sufficient punishment for it....





Well this is fun isn't it?
   
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annabenedetti annabenedetti is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 05:25 PM
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Originally Posted by Arthur Brain View Post
Lets just hope he received sufficient punishment for it....
I'm not sure he got the punch line right, though. Maybe with more practice?



   
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May 7th, 2012, 05:29 PM
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Originally Posted by annabenedetti View Post
I'm not sure he got the punch line right, though. Maybe with more practice?
I didn't see a punchline at all....





Well this is fun isn't it?
   
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annabenedetti annabenedetti is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 05:33 PM
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I didn't see a punchline at all....

He didn't either, before it landed.
   
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Eeset Eeset is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 05:40 PM
I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off.

So I ran over and said, “Stop! Don’t do it!”

“Why shouldn’t I?”

“Well, there’s so much to live for!”

“Like what?”

“Well, are you religious or atheist?”

“Religious.”

“Me too! What are you? Christian, Jewish, Buddhist? What?”

“Christian.”

“Me too! Catholic or Protestant?”

“Protestant.”

“Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?”

“Baptist!”

“Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?”

“Baptist Church of God!”

“Me too! Original Baptist Church of God or Reformed Baptist Church of God?”

“Reformed Baptist Church of God!”

“No way! Me too! Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?”

“Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915!”

I said, “Die, heretic scum!” and pushed him off.
   
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May 7th, 2012, 05:40 PM
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Originally Posted by annabenedetti View Post
He didn't either, before it landed.




Well this is fun isn't it?
   
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zippy2006 zippy2006 is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 05:54 PM
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I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off.
Almost as good as the interrupting cow told by "Man 1" and "Man 2."





"If a sheerly linguistic version of the gospel could be concocted, it would merely so be no longer the gospel. In the Lutheran Reformation’s understanding, which we believe in this matter to be correct, the sacraments make the inalienable externality of the gospel message and therefore are necessary to the authenticity of that message." (Christian Dogmatics [1984], II:302-303 as cited in Pontifications)

-Falsity of OSAS
   
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May 7th, 2012, 06:00 PM
A little nine year old girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill.

"Mommy" she said "Can we leave now?"

"No" her mother replied.

"Well, I think I have to throw up!"

"Then go out the front door and around to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush."

In about two minutes the little girl returned to her seat.

"Did you throw up?" her mother asked.

"Yes" the little girl replied.

"Well, how could you have gone all the way to the back of the church and return so quickly?"

"I didn't have to go out of the church, Mommy" the little girl replied, "They have a box next to the front door that says 'for the sick'."
   
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mikeymikey mikeymikey is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 06:02 PM
(silently looking out for comedian of the year and best joke of 2012... or any other year)



   
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zippy2006 zippy2006 is offline
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May 7th, 2012, 06:05 PM
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Originally Posted by Town Heretic View Post
Why can't the T-Rex clap its hands?

Because it's extinct, you moron.
Ya hear about the fire at the circus? It was intents.




"If a sheerly linguistic version of the gospel could be concocted, it would merely so be no longer the gospel. In the Lutheran Reformation’s understanding, which we believe in this matter to be correct, the sacraments make the inalienable externality of the gospel message and therefore are necessary to the authenticity of that message." (Christian Dogmatics [1984], II:302-303 as cited in Pontifications)

-Falsity of OSAS
   
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