Dear Oatmeal: You were doing wonderful until those last two words.
There is no such animal as "eternal death"!
"He will swallow up death forever. The Lord GOD will wipe away the tears from every face and remove the disgrace of His people from the whole earth. For the LORD has spoken."
"For the perishable must be clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come to pass: Death has been swallowed up in victory. Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?”
The Heavenly big gulp= death swallowed up in victory
"We all must die and are like water spilled on the ground that cannot be gathered up again, but the Lord does not take away life, instead He devises ways for the banished to be restored."
Well, you have a point, that is for sure. The phrase "eternal death" is not found in scripture.
So how long is death? it can only be alleviated by being raised from the dead.
The first resurrection is the resurrection of the just to eternal life and rewards.
The second death is the resurrection to judgement and condemnation and the second death which lasts how long?
However, Death is swallowed up in victory for the believer, not for the unbeliever who refuses the life God offered to all.
Since they chose death over life, they get death.
See Deuteronomy 30:14-16,19-20
14 But the word is very nigh unto thee, in thy mouth, and in thy heart, that thou mayest do it.
15 See, I have set before thee this day life and good, and death and evil;
16 In that I command thee this day to love the Lord thy God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commandments and his statutes and his judgments, that thou mayest live and multiply: and the Lord thy God shall bless thee in the land whither thou goest to possess it.
19 I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:
20 That thou mayest love the Lord thy God, and that thou mayest obey his voice, and that thou mayest cleave unto him: for he is thy life, and the length of thy days: that thou mayest dwell in the land which the Lord sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.
The underlying concept runs true throughout the word of God.
Genesis 2:17
But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
If they had chosen to obey God, Adam and Eve would have been alive in paradise today, but they chose evil instead of good, they chose the lie instead of the truth
John 10:10
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
You either choose serving our adversary which choice subjects you to the will of the Devil which is to be stolen from, killed and destroyed
or
you follow and serve the lord Jesus Christ which results not only in life but life more abundant, which starts with eternal life instead of death
Even for the believer today, the choice is the same although we cannot lose our eternal life, our life and the joy of life can be forfeited by being carnally minded instead of spiritually minded
Romans 8:1-14 ...
There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
2 For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.
3 For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh:
4 That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.
6 For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.
7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.
8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.
9 But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.
10 And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness.
11 But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you.
12 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh.
13 For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.
14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
For that matter, being eternally tormented does not sound like any kind of victory that God would reward you with
